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Tag Archives: Awareness

‘Forget about your life situation and pay attention to your life. Your life situation exists in time. Your life is now. Your life situation is mind-stuff. Your life is real.’

Eckhart Tolle

I love Eckhart Tolle.  He has some great books.  Look him up if you get the chance.

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This is it.  The biggest festival of the year hits town.  It’s a beautiful sunny Friday afternoon and the crowds are already out.

Last night after work I walked around for awhile and then hung out at my favorite bar.  It was overall pretty quite, and I did not hang around long.  Tonight after work should be different.  I expect the town will be packed to the rafters.  Usually on the festival weekend the bars are so full you can hardly move.  Should be some interesting people watching.

I’m sure I will run into a lot of people I know.  I ran into a few peeps last night, and had some good conversation.  Of course, I also had to deal with a few random drunken conversations.  When I was drunk I must have been oblivious to these weird drunken talks.  Drunk people seem so much more drunk now LOL!!!  Slurring, drooling, unintelligible gurgling hehe.  Frankly, it shocks me a bit.

Is there a story here about the life of average Americans?  Or, a story about humans in general?  Is this really where we are?

When I was young I wished that I lived in the far future.  Present day society always seemed so primitive 🙂  I’m not gonna lie.  Going sober can reveal some stark truths about life.  During the days of drinking my brain was weakened and more susceptible to the placating media, and soothing control structures that keep you working like the little cog in the machine that is wanted.

Even under those conditions I was the cog that never fit.  Always causing problems for the machine.  Never “fitting in” just right.  After a month of sobriety my eyes are open again, and the brain is recovering.  The shocking truth is now in my face everywhere I go.  I can’t just put my mind on cruise control and slide by.

That’s ok.  I would rather be aware and freaked out, then oblivious and content.

Time to go and enjoy this wonderful day.  I can smell the festival food wafting through my window.  I better get out there in the sun.

– BST

Happy Friday!

I had the day off today.  It was a good day, and I got most everything done that I had planned.  I still did not wake up as early as I would have liked, but I’m gonna have to just keep working on that one.

Today is officially day 4 of my sobriety.  I think it’s the first day that I started to feel physically better.  Like I felt healthier.  I’ve been having trouble sleeping, and last night that was an issue again, although I did not stay up as late as I did the past few nights.  Could be a sign it’s getting better.  Tomorrow morning I’m going to attempt to force myself to get up earlier even if it means being tired all day.  At least that way I should be able to get to sleep at a reasonable hour.

Besides writing my blog I took some time to read the other blogs about this topic that I have found through the Tired of Thinking About Drinking blog.  That was the first blog I found on this subject, and it led me to find many others, and also get involved in the 100 day challenge.  There are many great blogs out there, and when I read them it really helps keep me going.  I am thankful for all the people out there who take the time to write.  It is one of the reasons I have been inspired to do the same.

Went down to the local meat market today to do some shopping.  I’ve noticed that shopping seems to be a much more fun and fulfilling task when sober.  When you live in the moment all those wonderful items in the store just fill up your senses.

On the way out the door they were serving Bratwurst to raise money for some school sports.  Man those Brats are yummy!

For the next two days I will be away from my computer.  The only Internet access will be from my phone.  Not sure if I want to attempt writing a blog from my phone, so my next post will either be Sunday night, or sometime on Monday.

Enjoy the Weekend!

-BST

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